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PARADISE FOUND By Cruise and Stoley

Disclaimers: They are the same as all of the previous parts.

Special Thanks to Kitty Kat for her editorial prowess (among other things).

You can contact the authors at: cruise1313@aol.com, stoley@hotmail.com.

PART VIII

"Doctor is Jordan going to be okay?" Bly asked growing more agitated with each second the doctor kept quiet not to mention how worried she was becoming.

"She's a very lucky girl. We've partially resected her liver effectively stopping the bleeding and with the blood replacement she received she is out of the life and death situation she was previously in."

Bly gasped in air as she realized she was holding her breath and her eyes filled with tears of happiness as everyone sighed with relief. Chance put his hands on Bly's shoulders and felt her tension release from the good news.

"When can I see her?" Bly asked anxiously and breathless.

"I'll send the nurse in to let you know...it shouldn't be long now. Don't be alarmed by her jaundiced appearance...it's normal with this type of an injury. Her yellowing or jaundiced look is from the loss of bilirubin in her system and once the liver regenerates that appearance will disappear. It usually takes about 3-5 days." The doctor explained.

"So, Jordan will make a full recovery?" Bly asked with concern.

"Yes, we anticipate a complete recovery with no complications." The doctor answered confidentially to a very relieved group of people. "I'll send the nurse in to let you know when you can see her."

"Thank you." Bly answered as she turned to her parents with a relieved smile and hugged them both.

Julie held Linda who cried from the good news. "It looks like you and Jordan will have a lot to talk about when she wakes up." Julie replied as she kissed Linda's cheek.

"It's not like we don't have a lot to talk about normally but now we have a lot of really overwhelming stuff to deal with...I mean we're sisters and it really blows my mind Julie." Linda answered with a smile before hugging Julie.

"I guess it would be very overwhelming babe." Julie answered as she held her lover tighter.

"Excuse me...ah..Dawson, hey, here's the items from Jordan's car you asked me to retrieve." The officer replied as she entered the room and handed them to Dawson in a box with a smile.

"Oh, thanks Lynea. I appreciate you getting them for Jordan and I'm sure she does too." He answered with a smile showing Bly he was quite smitten with the attractive officer as she watched the interaction with the woman and her brother.

"No problem. I was glad I could help. See ya." She answered with a smile before leaving the room.

"Here Bly...I made sure no one took anything from her car." Dawson answered as he handed her the box noticing the mischievous look on his sister's face.

"What?" He asked hesitantly, feeling slightly uncomfortable from her look.

"Why don't you go ask her out Daw. I know you want too. Go on, and thanks for getting this stuff for Jordan...we both appreciate all of your help." She answered with a smile as she patted her brother on the back and nudged him towards the door.

"It's that obvious?" He asked with a sly grin.

"Blatantly." Bly answered with a chuckle and looked inside the box as her brother left the room. She felt a catch in her heart as she reached inside and pulled out Jordan's award she won the previous night. Her blue eyes filled with tears of happiness as she read the award. Bly felt guilty that she hadn't been there to see Jordan win it and tears streaked her face as she lightly rubbed her thumb over Jordan's name on the faceplate trying to make a connection to her injured lover as her guilt overwhelmed her.

Bly felt that if she had been with Jordan none of this would have happened. She would have seen Jordan on the happiest day of her life...to see the wonderful smile Jordan would have possessed when she won and to be the one that Jordan celebrated her award with. 'I will never forgive myself for not being with Jordan.' Bly told herself as she wiped her tears away.

Linda stood next to Bly and put her hand on Bly's shoulder to comfort her. She knew what Bly was thinking...she could see the guilt in Bly's blue eyes when they looked up at her. "Bly...Jordan wouldn't want you to feel so guilty and you know it." Linda responded soothingly.

"Yeah...I know she wouldn't want me to...but it doesn't change the fact that I should have been here with her." Bly answered sadly as she picked up Jordan's sunglasses case trying to feel a connection to Jordan once again and remembered how Jordan had to search all over the Sawgrass Mills outlet mall for the case one Saturday afternoon, of course, dragging Bly along with her. She smiled fondly as she remembered the simple pleasure and happiness on Jordan's face when she finally found the case she was looking for. Bly hadn't realized until just then how something so simple could mean so much and she had taken it for granted. 'Never again.' Bly told herself.

"Bly...you both had obligations that were important to you and you should have fulfilled them...otherwise, you would have blamed each other for not seeing them out."

"I guess...but I hurt inside because I missed something so important to Jordan and because...I...aah...nearly lost Jordan. It hurts down to the deepest depths of my soul Linda to know that Jordan must have been terrified when everything happened and I wasn't there for her." Bly stammered as she looked down at the award finding it hard to talk about the accident and the pain she felt increased when she thought of Jordan being alone. Maybe it was just her ego getting in the way that she could have prevented the accident from happening or just plain stupidity...she wasn't sure but she did know that she should have been with Jordan and she wasn't...that...was unacceptable to her.

"You can't go back and change anything Bly. All you can do is move on knowing that Jordan loves you with all of her heart and soul."

Bly took in a deep breath and slowly let it out fighting the tears that wanted to fall harder. "I guess, but it's going to take a long time for me to forgive myself Linda. Uhmmm, would you mind if I tell Jordan about her being adopted and that you're her sister...if that's alright with you?" Bly asked as she wiped the tears from her face hating the fact that she was crying in front of Linda. She felt completely vulnerable and wasn't used to showing her emotions like she just did in front of Linda or anyone for that fact. Jordan was the person who showed her it was okay to show those emotions to others and that she didn't always have to be so stoic, but she still felt uncomfortable doing it.

"Absolutely, it will give me a chance to figure out what I'm going to say to Jord...aah...my sister...that is so weird." Linda answered with a smile, as it was overwhelming to her finding out that her best friend is actually her sister.

"That's not hard between you two seeing as how you both have the gift for gab."

Bly teased with a smile.

"Very funny Bly." Linda answered with a smile and hugged Bly. "I'm so glad you are with Jordan. You're perfect for each other and she loves you very much." Linda whispered in her ear before breaking the hug.

"Thanks Linda...I love Jordan more than life itself and that will never change." Bly answered with a smile before turning to the nurse who entered the room.

"You can see Jordan now...but one at a time please." She replied before leaving the room.

Bly was out of the room without saying a word to anyone and was standing at the end of the bed before she knew it gazing down at her still lover. Her blue eyes filled with tears and she felt her heart stop beating as she thought about the circumstances of the accident along with the seriousness of Jordan's injuries. She thought about how she nearly lost the only love of her life and she couldn't hold back her feeling of guilt as her tears streaked her face once again. ‘Damn!...this crying bit is so old...grab a hold of yourself woman!’ Bly admonished herself for being so sappy and emotional.

Bly wanted nothing more than to trade places with Jordan and take all of her pain away. ‘That should be me laying there not Jordan...this is all of my fault.’ Bly admonished herself quietly as the nurse approached.

"Try to see if she'll wake up. She doesn't seem to want to wake up." The nurse instructed Bly as she checked Jordan's chart.

Bly chuckled. "That's because you don't know how much she loves to sleep." Bly answered with a laugh as she wiped her tears away as she thought fondly of how Jordan likes to sleep. She had devised many ways to try and wake Jordan from her deep sleep, but she was most fond of placing soft kisses along her soft neck, which always brought Jordan out of her dreams.

"But I'll see what I can do." Bly answered as she moved to the side of the bed and pulled a rolling stool over to sit on as she took Jordan's hand in her own. Jordan's hand was cold and she rubbed her hand to warm it. She leaned over Jordan and whispered. "I'm here baby...I love you Jordan." In her ear before lightly kissing her forehead. Bly looked up at the monitor and noticed the faster pace of her heartbeat and smiled as she felt Jordan tighten her grip on her hand.

Bly was relieved that Jordan responded to her and sat back on the stool as she put Jordan's hand against her cheek. The connection to Jordan was everything she needed to feel and her tears slipped down her cheeks as she noticed how pale Jordan looked along with a yellowish discoloration the doctor said she would possess. Bly tried to speak but had to clear her throat as nothing would come out.

"Jordan...they want me to try and wake you up. I had to laugh and told them you love to sleep and that it's no easy task waking you up." Bly replied with a smile before lightly kissing Jordan's hand and putting it back against her cheek. She heard Jordan's heart beat speed up again and saw Jordan attempt to open her eyes but was unable to. "Baby...if you want to sleep go ahead...I'll stand guard and keep the wretched nurses from trying to wake you up. They can be quite persistent and cranky, but I'll set them straight for you...I'll be right here beside you." Bly answered as she pushed Jordan's hair back off her forehead trying to make light of the situation by using jokes. Bly found it hard to deal with seeing Jordan laying in the bed attached to the monitors looking like death warmed over. She noticed Jordan slip back asleep as she thought about how much she loved Jordan and wanted to hold her in her arms to comfort her...to make her pain go away and to make her feel safe again.

'Jordan...I want you to know how much I love you. Before I met you I lived outside of my emotions and I never started to live my life until you entered it. Everything that I ever need I see when I look into your beautiful green eyes...they show me everything you are and that's all I need. Every moment I spend with you shows me that's where I'm suppose to be. My eyes were opened to a new paradise when I met you and when you smile at me I feel all of my passions unfold.' Bly's silent admission of her feelings left her raw and open. Choking back the tears she whispered, "I love you from the depths of my soul. I hope you know that and forgive me for what happened to you. This is all of my fault and I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself." Bly answered as she lowered her head and cried harder holding Jordan's hand against her forehead.

Jordan could hear the tearful admission of the person she loved more than anyone ever. She couldn't stand to hear the pain in Bly's voice and struggled to keep her eyes open.

"Bly..." She whispered hoarsely as she blinked her eyes struggling to stay awake. "Bly...it's..." She tried to continue struggling to say what she wanted to say as she saw Bly's cloudy blue eyes look up and meet hers. She smiled when she looked into the blue eyes she loved so much.

"Jordan...baby." Bly replied excitedly as she stood over her and lightly kissed her lips. "Oh, I was so worried about you and I'm so sorry." Bly replied softly before kissing Jordan again.

Jordan squeezed her hand as blues met greens again. "You're not to blame baby...I...love you." Jordan struggled to say in a whisper with a smile meant only for her lover.

Bly smiled and kissed Jordan soundly to let her know just how much she loved her. "Jordan...I love you so much babe...I was so scared." Bly answered as her blues filled with tears.

Jordan smiled and loved being so close to her blue eyed lover but it upset her to see the pain in Bly's eyes. "Bly...honey...don't be so upset...I'm going to be okay...right? I don't even know what's wrong with me." Jordan answered with a chuckle yet confused. She found it easier to speak now and wiped Bly's tears away. "I am going to be okay...right?" She asked to get reassurance from Bly who smiled and sat back on the stool continuing her hold on Jordan's hand.

"The doctor said they are expecting a complete recovery babe. You had a lacerated liver which they partial resected." Bly tried to explain and saw the confusion on Jordan's face.

"What did they do to my liver?" Jordan asked nervously.

"They had to remove the damaged part of it or you would have...aah...bled to death. But you will make a full recovery from it...I promise you." Bly answered trying to reassure her nervous lover whose green eyes filled with tears. She kissed Jordan on the cheek and held her hand tighter.

"Will I have problems down the road with my liver Bly?" Jordan asked as she turned her head and looked at Bly as her tears slipped down her cheek.

Bly couldn't stand to see Jordan cry and her eyes watered as she looked at her. "You shouldn't have any problems down the road babe...once your liver regenerates from the injury...everything should be fine." Bly answered reassuringly as she wiped her tears away.

"Aah...Jordan...I have some bad news and some really great news to tell you." Bly replied as she looked down at Jordan's hand as she tried to figure out how to tell Jordan that her parents wanted nothing to do with her and how they have washed their hands of her.

"What is it Bly...you're scaring me." Jordan answered in a shaky voice.

"No...I didn't mean to scare you...I'm just trying to figure out how to delicately put it without hurting you."

"Just say it Bly...what is it? I'm a big girl...I can handle it." Jordan answered worriedly and with agitation at Bly's reluctance to tell her.

"Okay...Jordan...my father told me your parents washed their hands of you because of our relationship and they weren't willing to help you when you needed blood. Uhmmm...they also said that you were adopted." Bly answered softly as she saw the horrified look on Jordan's face.

"Adopted?" Jordan gasped with disbelief as she lifted her head up and looked at Bly.

"Yes, adopted and we found your birth sister...that's the good news." Bly answered with a slight smile.

"I have a sister? How did you find her?" Jordan asked with total disbelief as to what she was hearing. It did explain the way her family treated her but didn't explain why her birth mother would give her up. ‘Now...I have a sister?’ She thought to herself unable to grasp what it was that Bly was saying to her...it was too overwhelming.

"You needed blood and you have a very rare blood type and that's how they were able to locate her." Bly answered as she kissed the back of Jordan's hand to calm and reassure her overwhelmed lover.

"Where does she live?" Jordan asked with excitement and wonderment as her fears and confusion left her when the full impact of what Bly said of her having a sister hit her. She had always wanted a sister to share her hopes and dreams with and now she had one.

"She lives here Jordan...it's Linda...she's your sister." Bly answered with a smile and saw Jordan's eyes widen with excitement.

"Linda's my sister?!" Jordan exclaimed with a smile and disbelief at what Bly had just told her.

"Yes, and you also have a brother too. We don't know where he is yet." Bly replied wondering if they could find him. She would have to ask her mother and Dawson to look into it. "Linda's waiting outside to see you whenever you are ready."

"In a minute, okay?" Jordan looked up sadly at Bly and she knew what was on Jordan's mind. There was no way to get around the fact that her adoptive parents just couldn't accept Jordan for who she was.

"They really don't care about what happens to me, do they?" Jordan's voice was low and cracked with emotion when she asked Bly.

"I'm sorry baby, there wasn't a whole lot they could do about the blood you needed." Bly tried to skirt the real issue to save Jordan from further pain.

"But, that's not the real reason is it?" Jordan knew that she had never truly felt like she belonged. She had always assumed it was a defect in herself that she had continually disappointed her parents. Now, she knew that no matter what she did, she would always disappoint them because they weren't her real parents and when she had told them of her relationship with Bly, she had basically cut off any remaining ties that she had with them. She had given them the excuse they needed to let her go.

"No, it's not." Bly answered simply worried about how Jordan was coping with everything at once. "But I can tell you my dad was ready to reach through the phone and strangle you mother when he told her what happened. He told me he was really pissed off at her." Bly replied with a chuckle in an attempt to lighten the mood. She wasn’t used to dealing with so much emotional stuff and it unnerved her.

"Really?" Jordan asked surprised that Bly's father would react that way. Jordan's face turned sad as she thought about how badly she wanted parents like Bly's...one's who actually cared for her...maybe her birth parents were that way but how could they give up their children she wondered with even more confusion and sadness.

"Are you okay?" Bly asked with concern as she saw the change in Jordan's demeanor.

"Yeah, it's just that I think I've always known there was something missing and it kind of hit me all at once. I'd like to see Linda now." Jordan answered smiling up at Bly. "But, could you do something for me first?"

"Sure, anything!" Bly answered exuberantly. Right now, she would do anything Jordan asked her to, no matter what the request.

"Bring your lips down here and give me a real kiss!" Jordan replied mischievously. Bly could see the old sparkle in her green eyes was back.

"Oh, I think that could be arranged." Bly leaned down and gently kissed Jordan's lips as they opened invitingly and she readily accepted and kissed her long and deeply. Jordan wrapped her one unencumbered arm around Bly's neck and held her tightly until she tired and had to let go.

Bly pulled back at the first sign of Jordan's trembling and looked at her worriedly. "I think we can save the rest for when you are stronger and feeling better. I'll go get Linda."

"Okay. Bly?" Jordan called the tall woman back before she could leave the room and looked up at her.

"I love you."

"I love you too, very much." Bly replied with fresh tears stinging her eyes. She smiled and turned to get Linda before she started crying again.

Linda paced up and down the corridor as she waited to see Jordan. Julie watched and, at first, tried to calm her down, but soon gave up and just leaned against the wall and waited. Julie was the first to see Bly come out of the room and caught Bly's eye. Bly winked at her and Julie breathed a sigh of relief. She knew things would be okay.

"Linda." Bly called quietly to the back of the pacing woman. Linda turned around quickly and moved toward Bly.

"Can I see her now?" Linda was afraid that maybe Jordan wouldn't want her as a sister or would hold it against her that she had gotten such wonderful adoptive parents while Jordan's were one's she wouldn't wish on anybody. "How is she?" Linda asked with concern.

"She is just fine and excited to talk to her sister." Bly could see the tension and apprehension in Linda's eyes and wanted to alleviate her fears quickly. "Don't worry, she is afraid she won't know what to say to you either. I don't see how that is possible because you two never shut up anyway!"

Julie snickered behind Linda and she turned and gave her a warning look edged with a grin. Julie threw up her hands feigning innocence and winked at Bly. Linda smiled at both of them and went in to visit with her sister and friend.

"Well my friend, is everything okay with you?" Julie asked putting her arm around Bly's waist and walking her back toward the waiting room.

"Yeah, I know we will be okay." Bly answered, but deep down she knew that the guilt she carried would not leave her so easily. She had much to make up for and would spend the rest of her life doing so. "Ooh, baby...I love those sweet cheeks of yours!" Bly teased as she grabbed a handful of Julie's butt glad to have a reprieve from the emotional toll everything was taking on her. Bly was having a wide variety of emotions that she wasn’t used to having and she wanted to keep her stoic facade up but was having a very difficult time doing it.

"How could you not Bly?...they are very sweet aren't they?" Julie replied with a cocky laugh as she looked back at her firm backside admiringly and Bly laughed harder at her best friend.

"Jordan?" Linda whispered as she peeked around the corner and saw her friend..no sister looking so pale and small. She was afraid she might be sleeping as her eyes were closed and she was breathing deeply.

Jordan's eyes flew open at the sound of Linda's voice and she smiled to her. "Hey Sis? How's it going?"

Linda felt a tear slip down here cheek as she approached the bed. She leaned over and kissed Jordan lightly on the cheek before sitting down on the stool next to the bed.

"Can you believe this? We're sisters. I knew we were always very close, I guess now it makes sense why. " Linda reached over and clasped Jordan's hand in her own.

"I could have done worse." Jordan teased Linda and received a light squeeze on her hand in reply.

"Very funny! Hey, I hear we have a brother somewhere too."

"Yes, it would be nice to find out where he is and meet him. Do you know any of the details about our real mother?" Deep down Jordan secretly harbored the fear that it was her fault and that she was unlovable, which is why neither of her mothers had wanted her. She just didn't have a good feeling about her birth parents...she wasn't sure why but she didn't feel good about them.

"No, not yet. I'm sure when you are up to it, Mrs. V. and Dawson can fill us in on what they have found out." Linda replied and looked into Jordan's troubled eyes. "Hey, she gave the three of us up for adoption, she must have had a good reason." Trying to be positive and to reassure Jordan that there had to have been a good reason for their parents to give them up for adoption...she also said it to reassure herself. She was trying to be strong for Jordan’s sake because of her condition but she was having a hard time grasping everything that was going on. Linda had her own concerns regarding her adopted family who she loved very much yet she wanted to know about her birth parents. ‘I’ll deal with that later...when Jordan’s better.’ Linda told herself trying to block those thoughts out of her head to concentrate on Jordan’s well being.

Jordan nodded tiredly and didn't reply. Linda reached over and kissed her lightly on the cheek. "I'm sorry that your parents weren't nicer ones. I wish we could have been placed together with mine."

"That would have been nice." Jordan smiled when she thought about the people that had raised Linda. They had become like second parents to Jordan. She always loved staying over at Linda's house.

"What about Cindy?" Jordan asked quietly, her hands trembled and she looked away from Linda. Linda placed her hand on Jordan's to let her know she didn't have to be afraid. "They haven't found her yet, but they will."

Jordan looked back with tears in her eyes. "I'm afraid to ask Bly."

"It's okay, she already knows. Her mother and Dawson are working on it as we speak. She won't get near you again." Linda reassured Jordan and squeezed her hand for emphasis.

"Well, you need to get some rest and I'm sure there is one anxious woman out there who wants to get back in here." Jordan chuckled lightly at Linda's comment.

"Like anyone could keep her out if they tried!" Jordan retorted jokingly.

By the time Linda had left the room, Jordan was asleep once again. The next few days resembled each other as each took turns visiting Jordan as she recovered.

By the week's end, Jordan was feeling better and able to sit up for longer periods of time. Jordan awoke in semi-darkness and felt a hand on her arm. She looked over to find Bly sitting on the stool with her head on the bed sound asleep. Jordan picked up her hand and stroked the raven hair that spread out next to her. She thought about how beautiful Bly is and how much she loved her. She shuddered as the thought entered her mind that she came close to never seeing Bly ever again which brought tears to her eyes.

Bly stirred at the sensation of someone stroking her head and peeked open an eye. "Hey." Jordan whispered as she kissed Bly on the head hiding her tears so she could secretly wipe them away. She knew it would upset Bly to see her crying.

"Hey to you too." Bly murmured and picked up her head. "How do you feel?"

"Tired. I must have fallen asleep, but it looks like I'm not alone." Jordan replied smiling and reached up to stroke the side of Bly's face. Bly turned and kissed the palm of Jordan's hand.

"Late I guess. I sent everyone home so you could rest. They want to move you out of ICU and to a room of your own as soon as you wake up...which is now." Bly smiled as she pushed the call button on the side of the bed and after a few moments, a nurse came in.

"I see you are awake finally." The nurse said as she checked Jordan's IV and removed the rest, shutting down the equipment. "They will be in shortly to move you to your room."

"Thank you." Jordan replied as she and Bly waited quietly for her to finish and leave the room.

"Bly what do you know about my real parents?"

"Dawson has the report. He said he would let you read it when you were ready." Bly answered and looked away briefly before looking back into knowing green eyes.

"Are my parents alive?" Jordan asked quietly, but deep down she already knew the answer.

"No, they died in a plane crash, which is why you were put up for adoption. There were no other surviving relatives to leave you with." Bly explained and got up to gently sit on the edge of the bed. "Your mother did not give you up because you were not wanted, but because she died. Jordan, no matter what, I want you to believe that, more than anything in this world, you are wanted." Bly's voice caught and she fell silent with her thoughts. 'I want to be everything you have ever needed Jordan...I want to be everything you have ever hoped for, wished for, and I want to be your true love.'

"I want you so much it scares me." Bly finally confessed and leaned down to kiss Jordan tenderly.

A tear slipped down the side of Jordan's face as she looked up into blue eyes clouded by worry. "As long as you want me, that's all that counts."

With that admission, Bly wanted so much to hold Jordan but had to content herself with pressing her cheek against Jordan's and whispering in her ear, "I love you."

Jordan thought about how Bly was her fantasy, everything that she had ever hoped and wished for in a lover. She just never expected to find that person...she didn't even know if someone like that existed until Bly entered her life. Bly...she thought is her true love and everything she had ever needed. Her heart fluttered when she thought about how someone like Bly could care and love her so much as she lovingly gazed at her sexy lover.

"Ditto." Was all Jordan could muster as she was overwhelmed by her feelings for Bly as two orderlies walked into the room and Bly got off the bed. Bly walked along side Jordan as they wheeled her to her new room. Once she was settled in, Jordan convinced Bly to go home and get some sleep. Bly agreed, only on the promise that she would be back first thing in the morning.

After kissing Jordan goodnight, Bly didn't have to worry about her, as Jordan was asleep before Bly even left the room. Smiling, she looked down upon her sleeping lover until she felt a pang of guilt and whispered, "I'll make it up to you, I promise." Before lightly kissing her cheek and exiting the room.

Dawson needed to borrow Bly's car for his date tonight as his was in the shop. He dropped Bly off at the front door of the hospital before headed to the office. Their father would give Bly a lift home after his rounds that evening.

"Be careful with my car Dawson!" Bly warned her brother causing them both to reminisce about the time Dawson had totaled the family car the first time he had been allowed to borrow it.

"You're never going to let me live that down are you?" Dawson replied shaking his head. "It wasn't my fault you know."

"Dad let you off the hook a lot easier than I will if you total this car!" Bly loved to ease her brother to see if she could get a reaction out of him.

"Don't worry 'Mom', I'll go right to my date and then go straight home!" Dawson replied dryly.

"Who's home?...oh, remember, she has handcuffs so leave her address in case she locks you to the bedposts and leaves, we can find you in a week or two." Bly teased referring to his date being a police officer.

"Very funny!" Dawson replied breaking into an embarrassed grin.

"Have fun bro. And don't do anything I wouldn't do." Bly got out of the car and leaned in to pick up the flowers she had gotten for Jordan and closed the door.

Dawson rolled the window down and leaned across the seat and called out to his sister. "That leaves the evening wide open then doesn't it?" Bly stuck her tongue out as Dawson drove away getting the last laugh.

Bly headed into the hospital and up to Jordan's room. She entered to find Jordan sitting up watching television. "Good Morning Sweetheart!"

"Good Morning? Flowers..you didn't have to bring me more." Jordan replied with an excited smile, taking the proffered flowers and reveling in the scent of the roses. "But, thank you." Jordan pulled Bly down for a kiss to show her just how much she appreciated her thoughtfulness.

"Well, I might just have to bring you flowers everyday if that is the greeting I will get." Bly replied looking around for the vase from the old flowers she had brought.

"You don't have to bring me flowers to get that kind of reception. You can have that and more as soon as I get out of this place." Jordan replied saucily and wiggled her eyebrows for emphasis.

"I can see you are feeling good today!" Bly chuckled kissing her lightly on the lips. "I'll be right back. Let me see if I can find the vase for those."

Cindy paced the parking lot of the hospital trying to figure out what to do. She knew she should get out of town now that her truck was fixed, but she had an overwhelming desire to see how Jordan was and to find out exactly what she remembered of the accident. 'After all, it wasn't entirely her fault,' Cindy thought. 'If Jordan had just stopped when I asked her to and talked to me, none of this would have happened.'

Finally, getting her courage together she took a second look around and, not seeing Bly's car, she headed into the hospital. She had called earlier and was told that Jordan had been moved to room 1221, but they would give her no further information.

Arriving at the room, she poked her head in the door to find Jordan alone watching television, a bouquet of roses lying on the table next to her.

"You really should put those in water." Cindy replied as she slipped into the room and approached the bed. Jordan jumped at the voice and turned in fear to look at the woman.

"What do you want? Haven't you hurt me enough already!" Jordan stammered in fear and anger. She hated herself for the fear she felt, but at this moment all she could think about was the truck in her rear view mirror smashing into the back of her car. She was reliving all of the terror she felt that fateful night and it scared the hell out of her.

"Hey, you can't blame me for what happened. If you had talked to me, like I asked, instead of running away, none of this would have happened. " Cindy replied shrugging her shoulders.

"So, this is all my fault? I wanted to have emergency surgery to save my life and be in the hospital? " Jordan shouted out amazed and angry. 'Just like I wanted your abuse too!'

"Listen Jordan, I'm really sorry that you got hurt. I came here to see if you are alright and this is how you treat me. Blaming me for everything, you always do that!" Cindy replied flatly. "Why do you always have to turn everything into a fight?"

"Me? I think you'd better leave Cindy." Jordan replied ready to push the call button if necessary.

Bly waited at the nurses' station for them to find a vase for her. Finally, vase in hand she walked back toward Jordan's room and met up with her mother and Linda coming out of the elevator.

"Fancy meeting you here!" Bly called out as the women approached her.

"Yes, I met Linda in the lobby. Looks like we both had the same idea of visiting Jordan before we go in to work." Alexandra replied, kissing her daughter on the cheek. "How is our girl?" She asked as she hugged Bly and rubbed her back comfortingly.

"She must be getting better because she is already up to teasing me." Bly replied grinning like a parent whose child had just taken its first step.

"That's fantastic!" Linda replied before realizing what she said. "I mean its fantastic that she is feeling better, not that she is teasing you. Although, you probably deserve it!"

"Oh, I do? do I?!" Bly chuckled and led the way back to Jordan's room. Approaching the room, Bly heard Jordan's raised voice and quickly entered the room.

When Bly saw Cindy standing next to the bed, she could feel her blood begin to run cold and her hands clench into fists. The veins in Bly's neck popped out as anger coursed throughout her, and her temper consumed her. Alexandra and Linda stood behind Bly and their mouths dropped in surprise at the woman's audacity to show her face.

"What the hell are you doing here? I can't believe you had the nerve to show your face here!" Bly spat out. Cindy stood defiantly in the face of Bly and just smiled.

Alexandra knew the controlled fury that was building in her daughter, and she turned to Linda and replied, "I think we had better wait out in the hallway."

Linda looked from Bly to Alexandra and began to shake her head no, but the look in Bly's mother's eyes made her stop and turn about and follow the woman's instructions. When they got out into the hallway, Alexandra shut the door and leaned against it as Linda looked at her questioningly.

"Bly needs to handle this one alone. She has everything under control." She replied with a mischievous grin. 'That little bitch is going to get what she deserves.' Alexandra thought to herself knowing it wasn't proper to wish violence on anyone, but it was time for this chick to get a taste of her own medicine.

"You bitch!" Bly spit out before she launched herself at the offending woman. Cindy didn't have time to recover when Bly's body slammed into her, sending them both crashing backwards into the wall. Bly pummeled Cindy anywhere and everywhere. Cindy landed few punches on Bly, but she was no match for the fury that erupted from the raven-haired woman. Cindy gave up and tried, unsuccessfully, to protect herself from the onslaught. The only sound from Jordan was a gasp as she watched her lover unleash all her anger and guilt on the one woman who, more than anyone, deserved it. Still, she couldn't help feeling pity for Cindy as she watched the bully get what she usually gave out.

Alexandra and Linda listened to the sounds coming from the room and on a couple of occasions Alexandra winced in sympathy.

"Ooh, that had to hurt!" Linda replied when she heard something or someone hit the door behind them.

"Bly please!...stop!" Jordan cried out fearful that Bly might get hurt or do something to Cindy that she would end up paying for the rest of her life...like kill her. Jordan saw Bly turn to her as all the rage in her blue eyes left when they met greens.

Bly snapped out of her fit of rage when Jordan screamed for her to stop and saw the worry in Jordan's eyes as she moved to her side.

"Oh, no you rich bitch...this isn't over with just yet." Cindy replied demonically as she struggled to stand up as Bly turned to look at the wretched woman.

"Stay down Cindy...I know you don't want another piece of this action." Bly warned arrogantly but secretively wanting Cindy to stand up so she could beat the hell out of her more. Actually, she really wanted to bitch slap her using Jordan's mother...'now, that would be trick', she thought with a chuckle at the thought of her idea.

"Jordan's mine." Cindy answered psychotically and approached Bly. Bly grabbed the bedpan and swung it around connecting with Cindy's jaw squarely.

"No...Jordan's not yours, but this bedpan could become a permanent fixture up your ass if you want to possess something!" Bly shouted as she felt the thud of the bedpan connect with Cindy's jaw knocking her semi-conscious. Bly chuckled as she looked at the heap that lay on the floor, still struggling to shake off the unconsciousness. Bly felt relief that Cindy finally got what was coming to her...someone beating the living shit out of her, and Bly wasn't remorseful in the least bit about having the honors of doing it Bly thought as she tossed the bedpan on the table and sat next to Jordan who cried from her fear.

"Was that a bedpan I heard?" Linda asked as she looked at Alexandra who nodded in agreement with a sly grin that she thought, 'Yes, indeed sounded like one to me'. "Sounds like it connected with her head." Alexandra replied sarcastically as she turned to Linda after checking the hallway to see if anyone heard what was taking place in the room and said, "I need you to go to the nurses station and have them call hospital security. Then I want you to call this number and ask for Detective Nichols and tell him I told you to call that his hit and run driver is in custody here with security."

Linda hurried down the hall to do as she was bid while Alexandra continued to listen to the sound of fighting and hoped that her daughter was alright. Someone must have already called security, no sooner had Linda reached the nurses station when two men came out of the elevator and quickly made their way down the hall.

Alexandra slipped back into the room and found both women breathing hard and sweating. Cindy looked the worse of it as she lay on the ground with numerous bloody cuts and bruises on her face. She also held her arm tightly to her side, indicating that she may have injured some ribs. Bly sat on the edge of the bed holding a sobbing Jordan. She looked up when her mother approached and Alexandra could see that she would have a shiner come morning. 'Other than that, she looks a heck of a lot better than Cindy.' Alexandra thought to herself proudly.

"Security is here. I suggest you let me handle this." Alexandra quickly informed them as the door opened and the two officers entered. "Officers, just in time. My name is District Attorney, Alexandra VanDewark." She replied confidently flashing her credentials to identify herself. "Detective Nichols is on his way from the third precinct to arrest this young woman. She is the hit and run driver that almost killed my daughter, Jordan. I would appreciate if you would detain her until he arrives."

"Ma'am, what happened to her?" The one officer asked while the other placed Cindy in cuffs and led her out of the room.

"Resisting arrest." Alexandra replied simply as the officer helped his partner lift the dazed woman to a standing position and lead her out of the room to await the detective. Alexandra followed them out of the room to make sure Cindy wouldn't escape this time like she had in the past and, if need be, she'd shoot the wench to rid the world of such a wickedly evil person.

"Bly... what were you thinking?" Jordan asked fearful as she clutched Bly's arms when she sat next to her on the bed and looked into her terrified green eyes.

"I was thinking about how Cindy was going to pay for what she did you to you in the past and the present Jordan." Bly answered simply as she wiped the tears from Jordan's cheeks.

"Yeah and you didn't stop to consider what she could have done to you or what you could have done to her...you could have killed her and then been sitting in prison for the rest of your life!" Jordan replied angrily as Bly didn't think of the ramifications of what might have happened.

"No...I didn't stop to consider the consequences Jordan...I just saw that fucking bitch next to you and I snapped. I thought she was going to hurt you again and I was not going to let that happen, even if it meant that I would get hurt or whatever else could have happened. She was not going to hurt you again as long as I was there to stop her baby." Bly answered as she kissed Jordan on the cheek and pulled her close to hold her.

Jordan loved being in the arms that made her feel complete, peaceful and loved. She loved Bly so much and feared for her safety when she saw her with Cindy and didn't know what she would do without Bly in her life. It was unbearable to think about she thought as she held her dark lover tighter. "Bly...I have never had someone do what you just did for me... putting your own well being aside for mine and that means a lot to me. But it scared the hell out of me and I was terrified you would be hurt." Jordan answered with tears in her eyes as Bly broke the hug and locked eyes with her.

"Jordan...don't you know by now that I would give up anything for you?...I love you baby and I mean anything. I know I didn't give up the volleyball tournament for you, which I will regret to my dying day, and I promise that will never happen again. I would gladly switch places with you if I could so I could take all of your pain away." Bly answered sincerely as she kissed Jordan soundly to seal her exclamation.

Jordan broke the kiss and looked into Bly’s deep blue eyes. "How did the tournament go Bly?" Jordan asked enthusiastically even though she had totally forgotten about the tournament.

"It’s not important babe...aah...I’m going to put some ice on my eye so it will stop swelling." Bly stammered trying to avoid Jordan’s question regarding the tournament as she headed out the door for the ice not wanting to upset Jordan by telling her she played like shit and wouldn’t be making the Olympic team. That could wait until Jordan was fully recovered Bly thought as she retrieved an ice bag from one of the nurses.

A week later Jordan was released and Bly took her home to recuperate at her place. After three weeks at home, Bly still had not gone back to work full time since the accident, and she still wouldn't listen to Jordan's repeated assurances that she would be alright alone during the day. Bly would see her patients in the morning and Linda would come over to help Jordan start the day before dropping her off at Bly's work for her grueling Physical Therapy. The only reason she tolerated going to therapy was because of the gorgeous raven haired Physical Therapist she got to see there...Bly.

Linda dropped Jordan off out front and told her she would talk to her later to see how therapy went before driving off to work. She was lucky that her job was such that she could basically make her own hours and it gave her more of a chance to take care of her sister.

Jordan entered the busy gym and headed back to find Kim, her therapist, to get started on her therapy, but stopped dead in her tracks as she saw what was before her. She looked and saw Bly working with a hand patient at the table and noticed they were carrying on quite a candid conversation.

She was breathless from Bly's beauty as she saw Bly look down at the woman's hand with her raven hair draped to one side shadowing her dark features. Bly's gorgeous blue eyes looked up from the hand to meet her patients as she laughed heartedly. Jordan hadn't seen that gorgeous smile and laugh from Bly in weeks. All she saw was the top of Bly's head or her cheek as she wouldn't even look at Jordan of late. She was jealous and wanted her lover back...it hurt her that Bly didn't laugh with her that way anymore.

"How can such a beautiful and sweet girl such as yourself torture your patients as much as you do Bly?...You're killing me you know?...You just love to torture me don't you?" The woman teased as Bly looked at her and continued to perform range of motion activities on the woman's hand.

"Now Marilyn...didn't I tell you what P.T. stood for? It means Physical Torturer...not Physical Therapist." Bly answered with a laugh. "Besides, if I don't move your fingers around then you won't be able to use them and you'll hate me, which I just can't have happen." Bly answered with a laugh as she looked to the side and saw a vision of loveliness standing there looking back at her.

Bly's blues met Jordan's greens and Jordan caught the breath that escaped her when Bly smiled at her, only to notice that smile leave her face. In its place was a reflection of sadness and guilt. Jordan had hoped that Bly was back to her old self again, but it just wasn't so and the thought overwhelmed her. She couldn't stand the way Bly looked at her, as if she pitied her and, 'that was just not going to happen', she thought. She decided that she needed to talk to Bly about it. ‘It has to stop.’ Jordan thought angrily as she was disgusted by Bly’s demeanor.

Bly looked back down at the task at hand as her guilt overwhelmed her when she saw Jordan. She found it very hard lately to look at her without feeling so guilty and she wasn't sure how to handle these foreign feelings. She had never confronted the sweeping range of emotions that she had been feeling since the accident and didn't know what to do.

"Jordan...are you ready to get started?" Kim asked excitedly as the physical therapist approached her patient.

"Oh, yeah...just thrilled!" Jordan replied drolly with agitation at Bly's demeanor. She glanced at Bly's bowed head once more before walking away to get started on her program of strength and endurance training to get her back to her pre-injury status. The way Bly was acting really disturbed Jordan, and she was in no mood to do anything, on top of the fact that her wrist hurt more today than any of the other days. She figured it was because she was out of the cast and doing more with that hand than she had in a while. But, she was not looking forward to the pain and torture Kim would be inflicting on her wrist shortly to help her gain full functional use of it again.

Jordan had hoped Bly would be her therapist, but she had told her that it wouldn't be ethical because they were lovers. It wouldn't look good to the insurance companies if they ever found out Bly was treating Jordan, considering the lawsuit Jordan had pending with Cindy's insurance company. Bly recommended that Jordan go to a different facility so there would be no conflict, but the insurance company assigned Jordan to her office.

All in all, it had worked out well because then Bly was able to take Jordan home after her therapy, plus she could monitor Jordan's progress.

Jordan was beginning to wonder whether Bly was giving her a bogus line by saying it was unethical for her to treat her lover considering how Bly had been acting lately. She wondered if Bly just didn't want to be with her anymore and was in some sick way trying to push her out of her life.

After Jordan's therapy session she was in a lot of pain and was unusually tired. So, once they got back to Bly's penthouse she took her pain medication and went straight to bed without talking to Bly about how she was acting. The next morning after waking up without Bly in the bed she decided enough was enough and had to talk to Bly about everything.

Jordan entered the kitchen to find Bly had breakfast all prepared for Jordan. "How are you feeling?" Bly asked as she glanced at Jordan then back to her bowl of Lucky Charms.

"Could be better...listen Bly we need to talk." Jordan replied nervously and dreading every minute of having to do this sort of conversation, but she couldn't...they couldn't, go on this way any longer.

Bly closed her eyes trying to force the tears back knowing what Jordan was going to talk to her about as she kept her back to Jordan. She didn't want to deal with it right then and stood up quickly walking toward Jordan.

"I'm running late Jordan...can we talk about this later?" Bly asked lamely as she kissed Jordan's forehead and walked past her towards the bathroom, trying to avoid the conversation she knew she didn't want to have with Jordan. She knew she had to figure a way to not feel so guilty about everything, but she just couldn't and needed more time. So, in the end, it was easier for her to avoid the issue.

Jordan was shocked by Bly's reaction as she sat down to attempt to eat something, which she wasn't able to do. She sat lost in her thoughts and jumped startled when Bly entered the kitchen after showering and dressing for work.

"Sorry...I didn't mean to scare you." Bly replied sheepishly as she cleaned up her breakfast bowl.

"Bly...listen there is no need for you to continue working only half days so you can take care of me. I'm fine and I can do a lot more stuff on my own now." Jordan replied thinking Bly's work schedule would be a good lead in to the conversation she wanted to have with her.

"Jordan, we've been through this before. I don't need to work." Bly replied as she cleared up the breakfast dishes from the table and walked out of the room once again avoiding Jordan. Jordan slowly followed Bly into the guestroom, where she had temporarily moved to when Jordan had come home.

"And this, why are you still staying in here?" Jordan asked from the doorway.

"I'm trying to give you time to recuperate. I didn't want to hurt you." Bly simply answered as she moved around making the bed.

"You've hardly touched me since I've come home." Jordan looked at Bly for some understanding. Bly stopped what she was doing and stood with her back to Jordan silently.

"Talk to me damn it!" Jordan's voice rose with her growing anger. "Is it because I'm damaged or something?" Jordan asked fearful that Bly didn't want her anymore.

Bly spun around at the sound of Jordan's raised voice. "You don't understand! It's not that I don't want to be near you...it's just every time I look at you I realize that I am at fault for what happened to you. I can't go back and change that, but I can't go forward either."

"So, this is it? I'm suppose to live here with you moping around because you think you could have changed what happened?" Jordan asked her voice still elevated with fear and anger. She didn't want to lose Bly, but she couldn't live with her pity either.

"You are just not well enough yet." Bly turned back around to the bed ending the conversation as far as she was concerned. 'We don't need to deal with this until Jordan is stronger', she kept trying to convince herself. The words sounded hollow and lame, even to her own ears. She knew she was shutting Jordan out, but she couldn't get past the guilt that she felt.

"That's a convenient excuse for what the problem is here. Bly I love you, but I can't live with you looking at me like you do. You act as though I'm already dead and you've buried yourself in guilt so deep that I can't even reach you anymore. Well, I'm not dead! I'm alive and I'm here! You have a choice to make, either you live with me in the present and get rid of this idea that you could have saved me...or....you will have to live without me. I just can't take this anymore!" Jordan finished with tears burning her eyes. She turned and made her way to the master bedroom and closed the door behind her. She leaned against the door more exhausted then she had ever felt in her life as the tears rolled down her face uncontrolled.

Bly stood in shock with the pillow still clutched in her hands watching her life walk away from her. Slowly, she sank on the bed and put the pillow to her face muffling the outburst of cries as the pain in her heart became unbearable

Paradise Found continues...

(Cruise/Stoley, 1999)

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