Convert This Page to Pilot DOC FormatConvert this page to Pilot DOC Format




by Donald Scott

A voice came out of Ares's castle, "I'm bored, bored, bored!" Inside we see a man in black leather talking to himself. He almost looks like Ares but it's not. For it's Strife. "Uncle left me in charge and I'm bored." Then a female's voice, almost child like, calls in "Oh, Ares, Ares are you in there?" Strife recognized the voice and immediately hides behind Ares's throne. Then a beautiful blond woman put her head inside the doorway and called out. , "Ares, oh Ares are you in there?" Strife stuck his head out behind the throne and said, "He’s not here."

Callisto: "Oh, hello there little man. Now tell me where Ares is, or else."

Strife: "He went to pester Hercules in Athens. He said if I see you to tell you to meet him in Athens."

As Strife said that, he ducked his head again behind the throne. Callisto let out a evil laugh. Then said, "You better hide little man." Then she vanished in a flash of fire. Strife came out from his hiding place then said, "Boy, am I glad that the psycho blond is gone, but I'm still bored. Now what would uncle do on a day like this? I know. He would do bug Xena and, as he puts it, that little irritating blond. The only problem is I like Gabrielle." In a flash Strife teleported away.

Gabrielle had just finished setting up camp, when all of a sudden she felt like she was being watched. She whirled around with staff in hand saying, "Who's there?" Gabrielle saw no one. Then she said, "I'm not alone here."

"I know, I'm here."

As she heard the other voice come from right behind her. Gabrielle swung around with her staff . Her staff got caught and got taken away from her. Then she saw who had taken her staff away from her. It was Xena.

Xena: "Gabrielle, you almost hit me."

Gabrielle: "Sorry Xena. I thought you were somebody else."

Xena: "Who, The Easter bunny?"

Strife overheard Xena and thought to himself. "Mmmm the Easter Bunny." Then he waved his hands and all of a sudden the Easter Bunny started to hop through the campsite. Xena and Gabrielle looked in amazement. They saw the Easter Bunny hop on through their campsite.

Xena: "How did that happen?" As she looked at Gabrielle, then the Easter Bunny, then back at Gabrielle.

Gabrielle: "Don't look at me. You said the Easter Bunny."

Xena: "I know, I said that. I was just trying to be sarcastic."

Gabrielle: "I know that! What do you think is going on here?"

Xena: "I don't know! Maybe were just overtired from the past couple of days from lack of sleep."

Gabrielle: "Yes, that has to be it. Let's go to bed."

As Xena and Gabrielle were getting into bed, Gabrielle said, "I wish we had some of that special nutbread, handy. " Xena: "You don't need any of that nutbread. The last time you had some you were acting so goofy."

Gabrielle: "I know but I still wish I had some still."

Strife overheard Gabrielle's remark then, he waved his hands. Then Gabrielle saw a little present that appeared by her head. It was addressed to Gabrielle. Gabrielle, "Mmm what's this?" Then she took the present and opened it and she saw inside the box was a loaf of nutbread. Gabrielle took a bite of the nutbread, then another. She had half the loaf finished before she forgot to thank Xena for the nutbread. She bent over Xena's head and gave her a kiss on the cheek saying, "Thank you." Xena let out a soft murmur of, "Your welcome."

Gabrielle finished off the rest of the nutbread. Then the special ingredient started to take effect. Gabrielle said to herself, "Boy is it hot." Then she started to take off her clothes. Strife saw what Gabrielle started to do, and he picked up a acorn and tossed it at Xena. The acorn hit Xena in the head. It woke her up. She saw what Gabrielle was doing. She immediately got up and gathered Gabrielle's bed roll and wrapped it around her saying, "Gabrielle, have you lost your mind. Get dressed now!"

Gabrielle: "Awww, Xena, it's to hot to be dressed." As she tried to take off her bed roll, Xena grabbed a bucket of water and tossed the water on her saying, "This should cool you off."

Gabrielle: "Thanks, but I'm still hot, let's go swimming."

Gabrielle started to run to the lake near by. Xena took off in a dead run after her, saying out loud, "I wish you were back to normal." Strife, hearing this, waved his hands, and right when Gabrielle jumped into the lake. As she came to the surface she said, "What am I doing here and how did I end up nude? Xena where are you?"

Xena: "I'm here. Are you ok now?"

Gabrielle: "I'm Fine. But how did I end up here and nude? All I remember is eating the nutbread that you left me."

Xena: "What nutbread? I didn't leave you any nutbread."

Gabrielle: "Yes you did. It was in that little present by my head."

Xena: "The only thing I remember about nutbread is that you don't need any because it makes you goofy."

Gabrielle: "I know, and then I said I wish I had some. Then I saw your present for me."

Xena: "I didn't leave you any present, and for sure it wouldn't be any nutbread with that stuff in it."

Gabrielle and Xena returned to camp. They both went to sleep but every noise made they both wake up. Dawn came and even Gabrielle, who not a morning person, was up.

Xena: "I wish we had the answers to all the strange happenings to us."

Gabrielle: "Me too. This is weird. Like you said, you didn't leave me any present, which was the nutbread. All I said was that I wish I had a loaf of that nutbread. Then there it was next to me tied up in a neat, little present."

Xena: "Gabrielle you ate the whole loaf? Didn't that special nutbread last longer than a few moments?"

Gabrielle: "Why, yes it does. You remember. I was grounded for a couple of hour at least. That was the two slices. I ate a whole loaf last night. I still should be acting goofy now."

Xena: "Your right. I remember saying out loud as I ran after you, I wish you would snap out of it and you did. Right after I said that."

Xena: "I wish I had my hands on the person responsible for all of this!"

Then Strife waved his hands and in Xena's hands was a person. A nice young man wearing modern clothes, a nice young man.

Xena: "Who are you? How did you get here?"

Donald: "Hello, my name is Donald. I'm the author. I was just sitting at my computer and poof now I'm here."

Xena: "Are you responsible for all this mess."

Donald: "Yes and no. I'm writing a fan fiction story about you and Gabrielle. . ."

Gabrielle: "You mean your a bard? Xena, don't hurt him. He's a bard and I think he's kinda cute to."

Xena: "Later, Gabrielle. Ok, if your responsible for this story you better get busy and get everything right."

Donald: "I will. If the person responsible for getting me here doesn't send me back now. Or else I will have that person married to Psycho blond at the end of this story."

Hearing that Strife immediately waved his hands and Donald started to vanish. Gabrielle called out, "Come back later and will swap some stories. "Donald said, "I will. Just call for me and I will appear. Bye."

Xena: "Now that is out of the way. Lets get busy."

Gabrielle: "Well, Xena, he was kinda cute. . ."

Xena: "You and me are going to have to have a talk about your taste of men. First Joxer now Donald."

Gabrielle: "Hey! I resent that remark. He is cute and I do have good taste in men."

A voice came from up above. "Thank you, Gabrielle, you will always be my Goddess. ""Shut up!"Yelling Xena get busy on this story or else. "Giving the sky where the voice just came from The LOOK. Then they heard a voice yell for help. They saw a young girl being chased by three men.

Xena: "Stay here this shouldn't take so long."

Gabrielle: "Ok. I wish I was able to do the same stuff as she can."

Strife wave his hands. Then Gabrielle felt like she can take on the world. She saw that the three men had buddies coming to help them. Gabrielle let out Xena's war cry then did a somersault towards the newcomers. They froze in there tracks thinking they were about to be attacked by Xena. They came unfrozen once they saw who it was. Just a girl. They laughed and started to come toward Gabrielle. The first one came up to Gabrielle saying. "I'll take care of this pretty thing. "Gabrielle did a perfect backflip and kicked him in the jaw knocking him unconscious. His companions both charge her. She somersaulted over them as they looked back at where Gabrielle had landed. She did a double kick knocking the other two out cold. She saw Xena coming up to her with a mad look on her face.

Xena: "I thought I told you to stay put."

Gabrielle: "I know, but I saw their friends coming to help them. So I . . . ."

Xena: "That you did take care of them, didn't you?"

Gabrielle: "Will I did. Didn't I?

Xena: "Yes you did. Don't tell me you wished you were like me didn't you?"

Gabrielle: "I did, but enough of this petty bickering. Lets find out why they were chasing the girl."

Xena: "You're right. Come here, girl. Do you know why they were chasing you?"

Girl: "My name is Anna. They were chasing me because I said Ares was an idiot."

Xena: "They don't know I found out something. He is a idiot."

Gabrielle: "I wish Ares would lose his powers for a while, and Callisto was back into the lava forever."

Strife not hearing what Gabrielle had wish for. He waved his hands and poof Ares had lost his power. In Athens Ares was about to hit Hercules on the chin. Hercules barely felt the hit as he backhanded Ares. Still thinking Ares had his powers sent Ares sailing landing him on the roof of a house. Ares snapped his fingers to teleport to Hercules but nothing happen.

Ares: "What in Tartarus is going on here. I lost my powers."

Hercules and Iolaus started to laugh at Ares. What they didn't see was Callisto teleporting behind them and was about to hit them both with fire blast. When all of a sudden she vanished with a scream. They looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders. As they left Ares on top of the roof they heard him cussing. Saying he will get revenge on whoever did this to him. Xena and Gabrielle were heading towards Athens. Because they heard from a runner that Ares and Callisto was causing trouble there. They set up camp for the night, they knew they will reach Athens by noon the next day. As Xena was about to go out hunting she made the stupid mistake of asking Gabrielle what she wanted for supper.

Xena: "What kind of fish you want for supper tonight trout or perch?"

Gabrielle: "I think I'll take salmon."

Xena: "Wrong place, wrong season. . ."

Gabrielle: "Well, I wish we had salmon."

Strife hearing what Gabrielle wished for waved his hands and poof two fresh salmon were in the frying pan cooking.

Gabrielle: "Hey this is neat. You make a wish and you get it."

Xena: "Well, you better be careful of what you wish for. Do you understand?"

Gabrielle: "Yes Xena, I understand."

When they made it to Athens the next day. They found Hercules, Iolaus, and Ares in a tavern drinking.

Xena: "What in Tartarus is going on here? First I hear that Ares is trying to destroy Athens. Now I see the three of you drinking like your friends!"

Hercules: "Xena, Gabrielle come and join us. Innkeeper, bring another ale and a mug of cider."

Iolaus got two extra chairs as the innkeeper brought the ale and cider to the table.

Xena: "Hercules, you haven't answered my question yet?"

Hercules: "Well, since Ares lost his powers we have been keeping him company. Xena do you know he's not that bad once he loosens up and has a few drinks."

Ares: "You know, Gabrielle, you are beautiful I never understand what I saw in the ice queen over there."

As he fell off the table trying to point at Xena.

Gabrielle: "This is just great. I've got a drunk, ex God of war, that's in love with me."

The Voice: "Well you are beautiful. As beautiful. . ."

Xena: "Get back to work."

The Voice: "Yes ma'am."

Hercules and Iolaus looked at each other then at Xena with puzzled faces."

Xena: "It's the damn author of the story. He's in love with Gabrielle too."

Ares: "What! Somebody else loves my precious Bard, My Amazon Queen, My beautiful, beautiful Gabrielle."

Hercules: "You know Ares you might have had one too many drinks."

Ares: "No! I haven't I will go through Tartarus for my beloved. I would give up my god hood for my beloved. She is the most beautiful creature in the world, even more beautiful than Aphrodite."

Hercules and the rest of the table started to laugh. As Gabrielle's face turned a bright red. As what Ares was saying to her. Then somebody behind them said. "So she's more beautiful then me. "They all turned and saw Aphrodite standing there with a look that would have made Xena cringe in fear.

Ares: "Yes, I do! She's the most beautiful woman in the world."

Aphrodite: "Ok, if you think she's the most beautiful woman in the world then. . ."

Xena and Hercules both said at the same time. "Aphrodite, don't hurt Gabrielle because of what Ares said. " Iolaus got in front of Gabrielle to protect her.

Aphrodite: "Don't worry Herc. I'm not going to do nothing to that irritating blond over there. I'm going to punish the new town drunk. " Then she released a lightning bolt at Ares. It danced all over him and then it disappeared.

Aphrodite: "Well I've got to go now. By the way Ares when you sober up and get your powers back. Only I can get it off nobody else and it can never be covered up either. Bye"

They all looked at Ares on his arm was a great big heart. It said in the middle of it "Ares Loves Gabrielle Forever."

Hercules: "Oh boy. There's going to be blazes to pay."

Xena: "I just wish I had my hands on both of the people responsible."

Strife wave his hands, then he vanished, and appeared at the table be grabbed by Xena. Along with Donald again in the other hand.

Donald: "What did I do now?" As he cringed away from Xena.

Xena: "Your not the one I want." As she looked at Donald. "Go talk to Gabrielle."

Donald and Gabrielle: "Thanks Xena." As they went to a separate table and started to talk.

Xena: "Ok, Strife, I take it your mostly responsible for this mess."

Strife: "Yes ma'am." As he looked away from Xena's Look.

Xena: "Now you're going to take Ares back home and put him to bed and in the morning give him back his powers" Hercules and Iolaus both were shock at what Xena had said. She shushed them. "Your also going to send Donald back to where he belongs, after he and Gabrielle are through over there. :

Strife: "Yes ma'am." Then he vanished with Ares.

Hercules and Iolaus: "Why give Ares back his powers?"

Xena: "I owed him one so that’s why, and he's going to more mad at Aphrodite than any of us."

After Donald and Gabrielle finally finished talking. Gabrielle gave him a kiss on the cheek and said. "Thank you. " Donald vanished Xena went over to Gabrielle and asked what he do to deserve a kiss like that. Gabrielle said. " He wrote a nice story about Joxer and me in love. "Xena looked at Gabrielle and said. "He what?""he wrote a nice story about Joxer and me in love. "Gabrielle repeated it then added. "He's sweet" Xena said. "We’re definitely going to have that talk about your taste of men. The next morning Ares woke up with the worst hangover in his life. then he saw the tattoo on his arm he screamed.

Ares: "Strife get the blazes down here now!

Strife: "Yes, Uncle Ares. Did you call?"

Ares: "How the blazes did this happen?" As he pointed at the tattoo.

Strife: "I don't know uncle. If that's it I got to go bye."

He teleported away Ares tried to take it off with his powers but he couldn't do it. Then he heard a voice "It's my doing dear Ares."

Ares turned and saw Aphrodite. Then Ares said. "Why did you do this to me?"

Aphrodite: "Here let me help you remember. " Then she waved her hands and Ares saw what had transpired the past couple of days. Ares was getting madder and madder. As what he saw had happen the past couple of days. He apologized to Aphrodite she took off the tattoo as she left she said. "Ares and Gabby sitting in a tree. . " Ares launched a lightning bolt where Aphrodite was just standing. Ares waited a couple of weeks then he called for Strife. Strife appeared and said. "Yes uncle?"

Ares: "I think it's time you take a wife Strife and here she is."

Callisto appeared at Ares snap of the fingers. Strife yelled. "OH NO!" Ares said. "Oh yes! I pronounce you married have a good and short life Strife." Then Ares vanished leaving Callisto looking at Strife then Callisto said. "I hear your the one responsible for getting me stuck back into the lava." As she bared her teeth at Strife and started to shoot fireballs at Strife. Strife was running all over the place he tried to teleport then he heard Ares. "By the way Strife I took away your teleporting power. You don't want to run out on your new bride do you? Have fun on your honeymoon, you two."


Fan Fiction
Return to the Fan Fiction area