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Petracles - Goodby

by Phillip Howell

The following is a poem recently attributed to Xena. It is assumed that she wrote it shortly after the death of her former fiance, Petracles. Xena's former love, it will be remembered, died helping her and Gabrielle safeguard the AMBROSIA OF THE GODS from falling into the wrong hands.


A mood I've often felt before.
Will it become disquietude?
Na - just a lonesome pensiveness,
From pain not dulled these past long years.

You can't sit still in this old world
And not make waves, or take a stand;
Without a thought, I fell in love.

We joined as one for a brief time,
With hopes beyond our reach and years;
Our love a fraud, a lie, a cheat.

For a brief while you were my life,
Before our fates and time collide;
With love turned into burning ash
We parted ways with emptiness.

So now the lies can surely wait,
Suspected not or called upon,
For neither of us have the need.

To me it now seems so unreal,
Like scenes from a mysterious dream,
Of ghosts and tangled imagery.

I've travelled so much farther since
Known many places with different ways,
While in my heart I've kept no slaves,
But, oh, the loves I've filtered out.

What did I truely know of him?
I see with eyes the memory of you
Though which the lie and which the truth?

Here at the end what did I find -
A friend and trust - OH YES! - but then
No chance had I to say goodby.

Oh God who's so unreal to us,
A mask and shield to hide behind,
Be gentle to this man's remains -
He died before I made amends.

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