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Disclaimer: The characters of Xena, Gabrielle and Callisto, belong to Universal / MCA, I just borrowed them for awhile and intend no copyright infringement or other damage. The original words to Hotel California aren't mine either.

Violence: Nah, not really. Still, Xena, being Xena is going to be a little physical regardless.

Subtext: Yep, but nothing explicit, stuck to PG13 for this one, but if its illegal where you live, or if it offends you find something else to read. If you're not of legal age where you live... it'll keep.

Schlock Factor: This is a parody, written by request for the crew at the G-Spot for a benefit, they gave me five minutes - they deserve what they got.. Enjoy. I promise the next one will be a nice regular Xena adventure - maybe.


Email llachlan@ican.net

 

HOTEL POTEIDIA

By Llachlan


On a dark Grecian highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of the ocean rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
One look at Callisto, and my heart grew hard
I had to stop and fight

There she stood in the doorway
And I heard death's bell
And I was thinking to myself
Send her to Tartarus, damn her to Hell
Then she picked up a weapon, wanting to play
The Fates were around us
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the Hotel Poteidia
Such a backward place, so much disgrace
Plenty of room at the Hotel Poteidia
Any time of year, you can find her here

Her mind is bloodlust twisted, she got the Warlord bends
She got a lot of petty, petty hurts, that she can't mend
How they dance in her nightmares, sleep rage sleep
Some dances she remembers, some dances she forgets

So I called to the Bard
"Please forgive me my hate"
She said, "You haven't killed that spirit yet - It's not to late"
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake us up in the middle of the night
Just to here her say...

Welcome to the Hotel Poteidia
Such a backward place, so much disgrace
Plenty of room at the Hotel Poteidia
Any time of year, you can find her here

Blood leaves me reeling
Peridicus paid the price
And she said "You are a prisoner here, of your own device"
And in Ares chambers
He's gathered for the feast
You fought him with steely wit
And love will kill your beast

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the love I'd found before
Love, said the Goddess
You are destined to receive
You can check out anytime you like
But you can never leave

Welcome to the Hotel Poteidia
Such a lovely face, so much faith
Plenty of room at the Hotel Poteidia
So keep her near, hold her dear..

At the Hotel Poteidia ....


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